Is there any such thing as life balance?
The fantasy of keeping all the balls in the air seems like a dream worth striving for, but at what cost? Our priorities are already governing our schedules, we just need to keep our priorities in order.
At first glance, my answer to this question was no. There are probably only a handful of times in my adult life that I would consider my life to be ‘balanced’ (if we are working under the assumption that balance includes every area of my life).
I remember listening to a talk given by leading brand executives discussing how they found the right balance between life and business. One of the speakers said, “You haven’t had to prioritise until you’ve had to choose between two things that you can’t miss”. He was referring to the choice he had to make between going to his son’s primary school Sport’s Day and attending an event with some of his A-List Clientele.
You might read the scenario above and think the choice is obvious. Whatever option you settle on is likely to be a reflection of your priorities in life at the moment.
“It felt as though we had begun to glorify being busy.”
I’ve seen various diagrams floating around the internet which give you three options to pick from: ‘sleep’, ‘social life’ and ‘work’. The caption that follows usual makes some reference to the fact that being an adult means only ever having two of those things at any one time.
I remember a time where I fought to have all three of those things in equal measure. Since then I have surrendered to ‘work’ being a non-negotiable, whilst the battle between sleep and my social-life fiercely rages.
I remember being surrounded by rhetoric that equated being busy with being successful. There was a point where it felt as though we had begun to glorify being busy. I accepted the notion that having ‘balance’ in life meant performing an intense juggling act with the activities I did. After adding one too many balls to my routine, I learned that working myself into the ground left very little time to enjoy what it is that I had worked for.
Balance requires prioritisation. During some seasons of life, we have to put down specific activities as other things take greater priority. Just because we aren’t able to do something now, doesn’t always mean we have lost the opportunity to do it all together. Some of the opportunities we say goodbye to reappear in a later stage of life when we are more ready to handle them.
Achieving balance in life is possible, but what we choose to keep hold of will often be a reflection of our values. Throughout my time in education, I was encouraged to work as hard as I could to achieve the grades I wanted. I put down many extracurricular activities as I drew closer to important exams. However, my parents always encouraged me to keep attending our Friday night youth club at church.
“What we keep hold of will be a reflection of our values.”
At the time it just made logical sense: there was no way I was going to be revising on a Friday night, so there was no reason for me to miss youth club to do homework. However, now that I’m older I have a greater appreciation for the values that were instilled in me by doing this. No matter what season I’m in, my time should be a reflection of my priorities. Faith is a fundamental part of my life and that is reflected in how I use my time.
Instead of working ourselves into the ground and then reaching for the nearest book on recognising the stages of burnout, we should remember to take breaks amongst the time we spend doing. Some of the things we may seek to prioritise will only flourish when we create intentional space for them to do so. These things might include healthy relationships, completing a bucket-list, good mental health, personal development and even being a good role model.
Essentially, balance and prioritisation go hand in hand. There are so many things that we could do, but only a finite amount of time for us to do them in. If we are going to make any headway towards life balance, we have to choose which few things to start with.
Words by
Kezia Owusu
