To speak or not to speak?
With the barrage of complicated and tragic news in the past month, it’s likely we feel implored to speak up. Mass gun shootings and abortion law changes in the US have rippled far beyond the American borders. How do we know when to be silent and when to speak, not from a place of pressure but by our own choice?
Noemi Ottilia Szabo, Vogue Italia
THE GREAT ESCAPE
It’s little wonder why reality TV like Netflix’s Selling Sunset are fiercely popular. More than just something to do, the intensity of current affairs and news is such that we crave something light to bring back a sense of equilibrium.
Although a temporary fix, the escapism we experience from much less serious content is becoming a form of self-care to medicate against the difficulties we face through global reporting.
It’s not that we don’t or shouldn’t care about what is happening. Often we are the direct recipients of the outcomes of natural disasters, political decisions or financial crises.
When met with challenging news, perhaps the question is bigger than just what we think about it, but whether we feel compelled or even forced to share those thoughts publicly.
CULTURAL COMMENT
Given that we are digital natives, much of our conversation happens online, even with people we know well.
While some of us feel implored to use our platform to speak boldly about difficult issues, others of us get stuck over words and fear being misunderstood, or simply don’t want to broadcast our processing.
There can be an intense pressure to feel like we have to comment on everything, otherwise, we are perceived as tone-deaf or uncaring.
In the past month, we have been awash with news that has reverberated through our social channels. On 24th June, in a historic shift for American politics, Roe vs. Wade, a law that protected abortion as a constitutional right, was upended after almost 50 years. Just last week in the US, the Fourth of July parade massacre saw six people shot dead in Chicago.
Both major events have triggered grief, anger, sadness, celebration, confusion and debate. Although happening behind closed doors with real people, these emotions have also been expressed by some publicly.
A QUIET PLACE
With landscape-shifting news like we’ve been experiencing, the fallout of emotion is to be expected. We know silence is not always golden, but maybe there is a time when it’s helpful to embrace it.
Have you ever felt guilty for not posting something in response to a major event? Have you ever regretted sharing your thoughts on a difficult situation because it backfired on you? You’re not alone.
Whatever your response to the events of the past couple of weeks, our online channels have been loud with opinions and comments. The problem with the flurry of these conversations in a detached, social space is that there’s a tendency for us to lean into polarisation.
The danger with being roped into making public comment on each major happening is that it’s easy to become an echo chamber of our peers or even the most popular thought. Much worse, is the tendency to highlight very complex issues yet forget that irrespective of our view, there is a real impact on real people.
In the same way that we may choose to speak up, others may choose to be silent. Openly shaming or silently judging others for their lack of comment doesn’t yield anything but more dissension.
PREFERRING OTHERS
In the Old Testament of the Bible, the writer of the book of Ecclesiastes when considering there being a time for everything says, ‘(There is) a time to be silent, and a time to speak’. (Ecclesiastes 3:7, NIV)
Perhaps it isn’t a time to be silent full stop, but a time to speak in a safe space. Maybe we need a trusted friend or family member to speak with, with whom we can process the weighty issues of our modern world.
It is undoubtedly important to speak up for what we believe is right. Finding the delicate balance between being vocal and being willing to listen is often easier to locate once we’ve led with listening in public and discussion in private spaces.
Faith may not give us a straightforward answer about when to speak and when to be silent, but Jesus was very clear on how we treat people who oppose us, ‘You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbour and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven’. (Matthew 5:43-45,NIV)
Although it’s not the easy route, choosing love and respect over broadcasting our views can sometimes mean staying quiet for a while. It may also mean having a face-to-face conversation with someone we love who is deeply impacted by actions and decisions beyond their control.
To assume that social media silence is ignorant or uncaring is narrow- minded. The only motivation we know behind action or inaction is our own, and it’s truly the only one we can be responsible for.
Amongst all the animosity, fear and uncertainty, we can choose to lean in. Being quick to listen and slower to speak grants us the maturity to process things in person with others.
Offering our thoughts and emotions on social media could be the thing that supports and backs another, but done in a reactive way removes the time we sometimes need to stand back and discuss privately with trustworthy confidants.
Time to stand back and observe gives us a chance to have an informed conversation when we bring things to the fore, avoiding the temptation of a quick clatter on a keyboard.
Whether you feel compelled to be vocal at this time or to process privately, our goal can be bigger than to dominate over someone who disagrees with us, to one of compassion and learning to truly hear one another.
WORDS BY
Rachel Calland
